{"id":2628,"date":"2011-04-28T04:43:22","date_gmt":"2011-04-28T11:43:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/gillin.com\/blog\/?p=2628"},"modified":"2011-04-28T04:43:22","modified_gmt":"2011-04-28T11:43:22","slug":"five-tips-to-make-your-writing-sparkle","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gillin.com\/blog\/2011\/04\/five-tips-to-make-your-writing-sparkle\/","title":{"rendered":"Five Tips to Make Your Writing Sparkle"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Now  that we&#8217;re all publishers, writing has become a core skill for  marketers. I love good writing,  and whenever I get the chance to teach  it, I share these five tricks I&#8217;ve learned to make anyone&#8217;s writing  better.<\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"www.amazon.com\/Art-Craft-Feature-Writing-Journal\/dp\/0452261589\/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpi_1\"><img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignright\" src=\"https:\/\/gillin.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/Art_and_Craft_of_Feature_Writing.jpg\" alt=\"The Art and Craft of Feature Writing cover\" width=\"193\" height=\"299\" \/><\/a>1. Write in Pictures.<\/strong> Former <em>Wall Street Journal <\/em>page one  feature writer Bill Blundell used that phrase in a seminar some 15  years ago, and I&#8217;ve never forgotten it. It&#8217;s the single best piece of  writing advice I&#8217;ve ever had.<\/p>\n<p>Human  beings think visually. The words we read continually conjure up images  in our mind. So why settle for ordinary words when vivid images are  available?<\/p>\n<p>Consider this passage from a <em>Journal<\/em> story from two years ago about <a href=\"https:\/\/online.wsj.com\/article\/SB124381591156970663.html\">the declining popularity of Grape Nuts cereal<\/a>. Describing the factory in which the century-old breakfast staple is made, reporter Barry Newman writes (emphasis added):<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>All day every day, objects with the proportions of <strong>hewn firewood<\/strong> and the heft of <strong>cinder blocks hurtle<\/strong> along a conveyor, <strong>dive<\/strong> into a steel chute, <strong>disappear<\/strong> down a black hole &#8212; and emit what sounds like a <strong>startled scream<\/strong>.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Each  of the bolded terms creates a mental association that makes the scene  come to life. Words like &#8220;hurtle&#8221; and &#8220;dive&#8221; are so much more  descriptive than &#8220;travel&#8221; and &#8220;fall.&#8221; These are words everyone knows; we  just don&#8217;t think to use them.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2. Tell stories<\/strong>. In writing <a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/dp\/1884956998\/?tag=wwwgillincom-20\"><em>The Joy of Geocaching <\/em><\/a>with  Dana two years ago, I had the chance to use one of the best opening  sentence I&#8217;ve ever written: &#8220;In early 2003 Ed Manley decided to kill  himself.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The  following paragraphs went on to tell about an injured and embittered  veteran who discovered a game that gave his life new purpose. It was a  powerful story that encapsulated the curious appeal of geocaching in a  way that no statistics could have matched.<\/p>\n<p>Storytelling  is the oldest form of human communication and the most instinctively  effective. They hit us in our gut. They are one of the most effective  tools we have to grab a reader&#8217;s attention. Tell them whenever possible.<\/p>\n<p><strong>3. Get angry<\/strong>.  Newspaper columnists use this trick all the time. We write best about  topics that stir our passion. You may think your situation doesn&#8217;t lend  itself to such emotion, but with a little imagination, you can get angry  about even seemingly mundane things: the way people behave in meetings,  the antics of an industry standards group or the way a company treats  its customers.<\/p>\n<p>Getting  angry doesn&#8217;t mean going on a tirade or hurling insults. That&#8217;s  embarrassing. Anger is better expressed with irony, sarcasm,  counterpoint or wry condescension. The more eloquent your words, the  more appealing your message. If you make people laugh, all the better.<\/p>\n<p>One of my favorite angry writers is the Baltimore <em>Sun<\/em>&#8216;s John McIntyre, whose <a href=\"https:\/\/weblogs.baltimoresun.com\/news\/mcintyre\/blog\/\">You Don&#8217;t Say<\/a> blog should be in every writer&#8217;s RSS feed. In a recent entry <a href=\"https:\/\/weblogs.baltimoresun.com\/news\/mcintyre\/blog\/2011\/04\/up_the_nose.html\">condemning restroom devices that periodically emit a spritz of perfume<\/a>, he wrote,<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>&#8220;It  does nothing to cancel out the underlying smell of the premises, merely  adding one offensive aroma atop another. It\u2019s rather as if someone went  to the zoo and spritzed the bonobos with Dollar Store perfume.&#8221; <\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>If you can send your readers scurrying to Google to look up &#8220;bonobo,&#8221; you&#8217;ve won.<\/p>\n<p><strong>4. Remove Unnecessary Words<\/strong>.  Do you ever get memos about how someone &#8220;facilitated the process&#8221;  instead of just &#8220;did?&#8221; Is there ever any reason to use the phrase, &#8220;We  all know that\u2026?&#8221; Have you received an e-mail stating that &#8220;Greater  emphasis and guidance was placed on ensuring\u2026&#8221; when it could have said,  &#8220;We stressed\u2026?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Verbose  writing and passive voice are drilled into us beginning in junior high  school, and we suffer the consequences of this injustice every day. We  don&#8217;t always have the time to tighten our messages, but it&#8217;s a service  to readers when we do.<\/p>\n<p>Try  this with your next essay or staff memo: Re-read what you&#8217;ve written  and remove every unnecessary term. Change passive voice to active:  Instead of &#8220;succeeded in accomplishing,&#8221; try &#8220;did.&#8221; Substitute short  words for long ones. See how many words you can remove without diluting  the meaning. You&#8217;ll be surprised.<\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/donfry.wordpress.com\"><img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignright\" style=\"margin-left: 7px; margin-right: 7px;\" src=\"https:\/\/donfry.files.wordpress.com\/2008\/12\/don-blog.jpg\" alt=\"Writing coach Don Fry\" width=\"140\" height=\"227\" \/><\/a>5. Surprise Your Reader. <\/strong>Writing coach <a href=\"https:\/\/donfry.wordpress.com\">Don Fry<\/a> (right) calls  these &#8220;gold coins.&#8221; They&#8217;re the little nuggets of information that  delight and reward readers for staying with us. Or they may just make us  laugh.<\/p>\n<p>Consider this passage from <a href=\"https:\/\/www.newyorker.com\/reporting\/2009\/08\/31\/090831fa_fact_brill\">The Rubber Room<\/a>,  a withering assault on the way the United Federation of Teachers  protects some of New York City&#8217;s worst educators. Describing a  competency hearing for fifth-grade teacher Lucienne Mohammed, Steven  Brill writes that her case &#8220;is likely to take between forty and  forty-five hearing days\u2014eight times as long as the average criminal  trial in the United States.&#8221; That little nugget of comparative data  validates the point of the story more effectively than any quote from a  frustrated administrator ever could. Brill did a little extra work to  make his point a lot more powerful.<\/p>\n<p>Or how about this gem from <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wired.com\/entertainment\/theweb\/magazine\/17-09\/ff_craigslist\">Why Craigslist Is Such a Mess<\/a>, Gary Wolf&#8217;s wonderful exploration of the enigmatic classified ad site in the August, 2009 <em>Wired<\/em>:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>&#8220;Jim  Buckmaster is tall and thin, [Craig] Newmark is short and round, and  when they stand together they look like a binary number.&#8221; <\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>I laughed out loud at that. It was a reward for reading the 3,000 words that came before it (which were also very good).<\/p>\n<p>The  three feature articles I&#8217;ve cited above are fantastic examples of great  writing. Here are a couple of others that I&#8217;ve used in recent classes:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.washingtonpost.com\/wp-dyn\/content\/article\/2009\/02\/27\/AR2009022701549.html\">Fatal Distraction: Forgetting a Child in the Backseat of a Car Is a Horrifying Mistake. Is It a Crime?<\/a> This gut-wrenching 8,700-word feature story in the Washington <em>Post<\/em> won the Pulitzer Prize in 2009. Read it and you&#8217;ll see why. It will touch your soul.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2009\/02\/15\/magazine\/15Battier-t.html\">The No-Stats All-Star<\/a> &#8211; Michael Lewis&#8217; profile of Shane Battier, a seemingly unremarkable NBA  forward who raises every team he plays for to a higher level  continually delights us with gold coins and features one of the best  conclusions I&#8217;ve ever read.<\/p>\n<p>What tricks have helped you become a better writer? Share them as comments.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Now that we&#8217;re all publishers, writing has become a core skill for marketers. I love good writing, and whenever I get the chance to teach it, I share these five tricks I&#8217;ve learned to make anyone&#8217;s writing better. 1. 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